


Beached

by SlaveToMyKeyboard



Series: Chromaticity in Motion [1]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Caliginous Romance | Kismesis, Flushed Romance | Matesprits, Hemospectrum Shift, Multi, Pale Romance | Moirallegiance, Slow Build, World Building Galore, bloodswap, more to come - Freeform, multiple POVs
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-01
Updated: 2016-05-12
Packaged: 2018-06-05 11:39:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,733
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6703207
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SlaveToMyKeyboard/pseuds/SlaveToMyKeyboard
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Your name is Karkat Vantas, and that storm left you so royally fucked that on a scale of one to regal, your current situation dwarfs the broken tiara digging into your frontpan by at least twelve notches. Twelve painful, embarassing notches that you will deny to have ever been etched into your memory, because this shit is definitely not happening to you.</p><p>Except... It kind of definitely is.</p><p>Act 1: in progress (updated 12/5/2016)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Act 1 Part 1 ==> GC: Talk to CG

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Edited 02/05/2016 - added some more stuff to TZ's intro (started writing the others and thought it was a bit lacking) as well as fixing a few minor mistakes.
> 
> Edited 03/07/2016 - removed the ii quirk from Nepeta's typing (don't really know why I put it there in the first place)

==> GC: Talk to CG

gyresCalibrator [GC] began trolling crustaceanGeneticist [CG]

GC: H3Y K4RKL3S!!  
GC: TH4T W4S ON3 H3LL OF 4 STORM L4ST N1GHT W4SNT 1T  
GC: 1 B3T 4LL TH3 L4ND DW3LL3RS W3R3 SH4K1N 1N TH31R BOOTS >:]  
GC: K4RK4T??  
GC: H3LLOOO  
GC: >:[  
GC: F1N3 YOUR3 PROB4BLY ON CL34N UP DUTY OR SOM3TH1NG  
GC: WH1CH 1 COULD TOT4LLY L3ND 4 F1N W1TH 1F YOUD L3T M3 KNOW WH3R3 YOUR H1V3 1S!!  
GC: ...  
GC: OK4Y W3LL DROP M3 4 L1N3 WH3N YOU G3T B4CK 1 GU3SS  
GC: 4ND TRY NOT TO HURT YOURSH3LLF DO1NG 4LL OF TH4T M4NU4L L4BOUR >;]

gyresCalibrator [GC] ceased trolling crustaceanGeneticist [CG]

Well that’s odd. Usually your friend would have responded with an entire page about how badly the storm ruined his night by now. Oh he’s probably just busy or sulking about something; you guess he’ll respond when he’s ready, there’s not much you can do considering you have no idea where he lives. He never tells you anything, not even his blood colour. You know it must be somewhere in your range though, since you found out that he was a fellow sea Troll after two sweeps of pestering him for answers (even then it was a mistake that he told you, but you’re counting it as a victory either way).

Well, since you don’t know about your friend, how about you discuss yourself?

Your name is TEREZI PYROPE

You are a SEA DWELLER whose blood is one of the highest on the HEMOSPECTRUM, second only to HIS IMPERIAL CONSECRATION and his descendant, THE HEIR OF ALTERNIA. But you don’t really care about blood colour too much. What you do care about is ROLE PLAYING with your various friends and acquaintances, and learning about the far more civilised JUSTICE SYSTEM of your land dwelling brethren. You long to ascend the ranks of LEGISLACERATORS and create a far more efficient brand of ALTERNIAN LAW by combining their system with your own subspecies’ BRUTAL PUNISHMENTS.

You also have a particular love of SEA DRAGONS, of which your LUSUS is a rare variety with the ability to FLY. You have a number of books about all of your interests, and make colourful drawings to express your ideas. You have been BLIND from a young age after an ACCIDENT with one of your friends, but you have no need for trollbraille because you learned to see using SONAR and the HAPTIC RECEPTORS in your skin that let you FEEL COLOURS. You still keep a cane with you though, just in case.

Your trolltag is gyresCalibrator and you SP34K W1TH TH3 NUM3R4LS TH3 L4ND DW3LL1NG BL1ND PROPH3TS ONC3 US3D. You also enjoy F1SH PUNS. 

What will you do?

==> Terezi: retrieve WATERPROOF TABLET

You already have your waterproof tablet in hand, it’s what you were using to attempt communication with your haemoanonymous friend. Unfortunately, CG still seems unresponsive. Maybe you should try contacting one of your other friends?

==> Talk to AC

You brush your finger across the screen until you find the colour you’re looking for, then tap it to open a new chat window.

gyresCalibrator [GC] began trolling alterplexCatnip [AC]

GC: *TH3 M1GHTY S34 DR4GON3SS L4NDS B3FOR3 TH3 DW3LL1NG OF H3R ACQUA1NT4NC3 4ND KNOCKS H3R T41L POL1T3LY ON TH3 FLOOR*  
GC: 4HOY! >:]  
AC: 833 < *the bicephalic feline pricks up her ears at the sound, flexing her claws before bounding two the entrance of her cave*  
AC: 8DD < hi Purrezi!!  
AC: 833 < what can i do for mew twonight??  
GC: 4CTU4LLY 1 W4S WOND3R1NG 1F YOUD H34RD FROM K4RK4T  
GC: H3 H4SNT 4NSW3R3D MY M3SS4G3S S1NC3 L4ST N1GHT >:/  
AC: 8OO: ooh do i n33d two update my shipping database??  
GC: UGH NO!!  
GC: 1TS JUST TH4T W3 H4D A B1G STORM H3R3 4ND 1 W4NT TO S34 1F 1 SHOULD B3 CONC3RN3D OR NOT  
GC: W1TH PUR3LY PL4TON1C 4ND UNQU4DR4NT3D WORRY  
AC: 833 < hmm, well i haven’t heard from him since last night either  
AC: 833 < but i haven’t tried two contact him in that time so that’s the most likely reason!!  
AC: 833 < *AC places a comfortiing paw on GC’s side, rubbiing her face reassuringly intwo the white scales that cover it*  
AC: 833 < i’m sure he’s fine, purrhaps he’ll reply later??  
GC: *GC R3TURNS TH3 G3STUR3 W1TH 4 G3NTL3 P4T OF H3R T41L ON 34CH OF 4C’S H34DS*  
GC: Y34H YOUR3 PROBUBBLY R1GHT  
GC: 1’LL TRY H1M 4G41N L4T3R BUT C4N YOU L3T M3 KNOW 1F YOU H34R FROM H1M?  
AC: 883 < *AC nods her heads furriously*  
AC: 833 < of course!!  
GC: H3H3 TH4NKS >:P  
GC: W3LL 1D B3TT3R G3T B4CK TO CL34N1NG TH3 1SL4ND  
GC: GOODBY3!  
AC: 833 < by33!!  
AC: 833 < talk two mew later!!

alterplexCatnip [AC] ceased trolling gyresCalibrator [GC]

Yeah, she’s right, Karkat’s a big boy and he can handle himself, you’ve got way more important things to do that sit around and worry platonically about his grouchy ass. Like clean up your beach for example… Ugh, the wind really did a number here. Your tent is up in a tree – you can’t believe you were stupid enough to leave it out – and appears to be torn in half. Brilliant. There’s half of a wooden dinghy wedged between some rocks, with the rest of it scattered across the sand in splintered pieces. You’re going to be getting splinters for perigees, you can just tell. Your own boat seems to be intact, carefully moored under a raised part of the rather dilapidated, but somehow undamaged pier. How that rickety old thing keeps on going is forever a mystery to you.

Thankfully, this seems to be the extent of the damage, aside from a few other debris washed up by the tide and some blown down trees. People said you were being stupid building your hive inland when you’re a sea-dweller, but it’s times like these when you have the urge to say “I told you so”. You might say it to Karkat when you manage to talk to him, just to piss him off a little. He’s so fun to mess with.

==> Dislodge DINGHY with CANE-RIFLE

You pull out your trusty cane-rifle and turn the power all the way down. You don’t want to give yourself more to clean up, you just want this thing out of the way. A single shot carves off enough of the boat for it to slide free of the rocks and down into the waves. Nice, that’ll make a great home for some fish when it sinks.

Hmm, that gives you an idea.

==> Go back to your hive

You return to the formerly abandoned fortress that you call home, revelling in the familiarly uneven patterns that bounce back to your fins from the outer wall. Man you love this place; it’d be perfect for a role playing campaign if any of your friends could actually be bothered to come all the way out here. Sometimes it sucks to live in the middle of the ocean. At least you have your scalemates to keep you company. You send out a few clicks to admire their multi-coloured forms hanging from the walls. Of course you can’t see what colours they are unless you actually touch them, but you remember where you put each and every one of your victims who walked the plank. Ah, enjoying the view Senator Lemonsnout? Good, because wasting the judge's time by having her bring you in from the storm has added an extra three perigees to your sentence! You chuckle to yourself and head inside.

Your hive is littered with more scalemates, along with various craft supplies of which you like to amass a variety of colours and textures. You captchalogue a large cardboard box and bring it up to your respiteblock, kicking aside a few of your plush jury members to create a space for it on the floor. You’ve been holding onto this thing for weeks just trying to decide what to do with it – it’s so big that you didn’t want to waste it on something like a fake scuttlebuggy or a replica of your hive (you already made both of those last sweep). But after thinking about the home that boat might make, you got an idea to craft your scalemates their own cardboard cave, one big enough for you to fit in too. Yes, this box is perfect.

You proceed to get extremely involved in making the most accurate cave replica possible using all of the art supplies at your disposal, causing you to completely forget about the very real mess that is still down by the shore.

Ah well, it’s not like anyone’s going to be visiting you, the tidying can wait until later.

Speaking of tidying…

==> TA: retrieve HORN from roof

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed the first installment of this!


	2. Act 1 Part 2 ==> TA: retrieve HORN from roof

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Edited 03/07/2016 - added the ii quirk to Sollux's typing (don't really know why I left it out in the first place)

_== > TA: retrieve HORN from roof_

Your robotic assistant lifts you up onto the flattest part of your hive’s roof, bringing you within reach of your prize. You grab the metal horn, smoothing your hand over the spiral form from base to rounded tip. It’s got a couple of scratches, but nothing a little buffing can’t fix. The horn’s owner is waiting when you jump back down, watching you silently with those glassy red oculars.

“You need to be more careful AA,” You tell her as she follows you inside, “I know I made you to be thtrong but that doethn’t mean you can jutht not care about what happenth to your body.”

“Okay.” She says, as emotionless as ever.

Well, of course she is, she’s a ghost inside a robot host. Not like you can force her to have the feelings of a live Troll or anything, that would be logistically ill advised and also just plain stupid. You _do_ have that emotions chip that AC helped you program, but you’re going to ask before you just go shoving it inside your metal companion’s body. Y’know, like any considerate person would. You flop into a chair and attach the set of magnificators to your glasses. Man you really need to fix these things, you can’t see shit through the cracked lenses, not to mention that the frames are warped beyond repair where you fall asleep wearing them all the time. But nah, the glass will just break again eventually and you are _not_ about to owe a certain jade blood a favour for rebuilding them. You don’t need that hanging over your already shitty clusterfuck of a life.

Sounds like you’ve got some pretty strong opinions there. Too bad we’re not cool enough to hear about them. But you guess you could take pity on us just this once, as long as the reader doesn’t go getting any ideas.

Your name is SOLLUX CAPTOR

You are an INDIGO BLOODED TROLL with an aptitude for MECHANICAL ENGINEERING. You are also apeshit bananas at computers but you lack the AMBITION to really apply it to anything useful, like converting that old code your friend found in some ruins. Your friends recognize your unparalleled achievements in the field of ELECTRONICS, but you often feel like you could do better. It is one of the many things you BEAT YOURSELF UP ABOUT for NO VERY GOOD REASON during your sporadic MOOD SWINGS. You have built a variety of ROBOTS that you programmed to act as personal servants and guards, and these robots do pretty much EVERYTHING for you. As a result, you are considered WEAK for a member of your caste. But you don’t really care. You prefer to strengthen yourself through PERSUITS OF THE MIND and using KNOWLEDGE to take down your foes. Not that you have any ‘foes’ because you don’t play DUMB GAMES FOR WIGGLERS like some people.

You like to speculate about HYPOTHETICAL DOOMSDAY SITUATIONS and often run COMPUTERISED SIMULATIONS just for fun. Your machines sometimes BLOW UP from the OVERWHELMING MISFORTUNE your codes cause, but you inherited so much wealth from your blood status and ONLINE GAMBLING PROWESS that you can order a constant stream of new parts almost every night. Even when you don’t need them. It has to stop. But addiction is a powerful thing.

Your trolltag is theoreticalArmageddons and you 2peak wiith a biit of a 2tiigmatii2m on your voiicele22 alveolar 2iibiilant2 caused by your two MISSING TEETH. But you don’t really care about this either because you happen to like the number two and all associated BIFURCATION AESTHETICS, even if it makes absolutely no fucking sense considering your background.

What will you do?

==> Sollux: fix AA’s horn

You remove the broken magnificator and pull over your regular magnifying glass instead, clipping it into place on the extendable wall bracket above your workbench. The screws at the base have been ruined completely thanks to that giant shitstain insect flying into your friend like she was coated in mind honey. At the thought of your favourite snack you click your fingers, and seconds later you are presented with a jar and a spoon by your faithful Lusus. This cyclops can be a bit of an idiot sometimes, but you’ve got him trained well enough. You don’t think you’ll let him loose on the apiaries AC sent you yet though, the robots can handle those, he’ll just bring you their sickly sweet spoils. You pat him on the head and take the jar, shovelling a spoonful of honey into your mouth before getting back to work. Mhmm. So sweet. A little something sugary is always good to soothe the migraines.

You don’t know why your friend keeps bees, seeing as she doesn’t code seriously enough to make full use of their biotechnology – unlike you, who is sick nasty at apiculture networking – and she can’t eat the honey because of her psionics. She says the bees are cute though, and if your Auspistice is happy then that’s all that matters. Currently, the two of you don’t have anyone else to fill your third ashen spot, but there’s always some asshole looking to pick a fight. You spend so long rambling to yourself in your head, that your hands go on autopilot and finish picking out all of the screws, fixing any damages along the way. The horn looks good as new.

“Come here AA,” You stand up and beckon your friend over, “hold thtill.”

“Okay.” She sets her feet on the ground, motionless as a metal statue as you begin to secure the horn back onto the side of her head.

==> Be done fixing AA’s horn

You weld the last fixings into place, then stand back and admire your work. There, like it never happened. It’s been almost a sweep since you built this robot for your dear ghostly Moirail, but she still hasn’t quite gotten used to having a corporeal form again. Besides the obvious ability to actually be seen by other people, you don’t understand why Aradia chose to give up her ghostly abilities. What you wouldn’t do to be able to just float anywhere and phase through walls. You’re working on the first part though; currently in the process of developing a set of electrostatic levitation gear powered by a highly advanced micro-reactor. So far the tests have only resulted in bruises and dented ceilings, but hey, at least you’re flying right?

“Thank you.” Aradia says, gently hovering above the floor with the same type of system you’re trying to create for yourself. Annoyingly, it’s much easier to build something like that when you have a whole robot to house it in.

Normally, you would either invite her to stay or ask one of your robots to accompany her back to her own hive, but before you can say anything, she places a hand on your shoulder. The hard metal of her fingers is a reassuring weight, heat radiating out of it from the wires pulsing like veins underneath her casing. She stares at you, and you stare back, waiting for her to reach up and gently remove your glasses like she does sometimes. You’re not sure why. Perhaps it’s the memories of when she always used to want to look at your eyes when she was a live. Your freakish, mismatched eyes. They stare back at you as she lifts the black glasses from your face, reflected in her own unnaturally bright orbs, one red like her blood once was and the other too blue to belong to you.

Aradia has a theory about your eyes; about how you were supposed to receive psionics like Nepeta, but it conflicted with your blood colour too much, leaving your eyes as the only sign of your mutation. You get a little self-conscious about it sometimes – hence the glasses – and you hate that it makes you unsymmetrical, but at other times you find yourself revelling in the duality of it, how it represents you and your diamond so perfectly. You’re opposites in almost every way; temperature, gender, personality (outgoing adventurer vs. tech hermit), hair length, spectrum placement (even though you don’t care about that), and now mortality. All silly little things, but for some reason they seem more important to you than anything else.

==> Stop reminiscing

Right, you don’t need to keep looking back on all of that. Aradia’s here and you can see her and that’s all that matters.

“I should go.” She gives your arm a squeeze, then drops her hand to fit it in yours. “I’ll talk to you later.”

Using the hand not in yours, she reaches up and taps the back of her neck. Colours radiate across her plating, dying her skin a slightly redder shade of grey, hair and lips black as charcoal, horns like a sunset. Her eyes are the last to change, flickering into egg yolk and rust, with a pitch dark pupil. You engineered the change to keep her safe, make her look at least somewhat like a living Troll – the bolts and welding sutures are only really visible up close. She’s already been killed once for being a ‘blood mutant’, she deserves to be safe. But seeing her pretend to be something she’s not, masking the cherry red she had in life with that dull burgundy, it makes you almost regret even building a robot for her in the first place.

==> I thought you were going to stop reminiscing

“Are you okay.” Aradia’s question (only in words, not in actual tone) brings you out of your thoughts.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” You give a little smile and let her fingers slip out of your grasp, “thpeak to you thoon.”

She nods, already ascending to the special entrance you made for her in the roof of your hive. You send an order through your wristwatch computer for one of the guards to follow her, watching their blue trails disappear into the clouds. It looks like it’ll rain soon, you hope they get back okay, the storms have been brutal lately.

Oh looks like one of your friends is messaging you.

==> Answer GC

gyresCalibrator [GC] began trolling theoreticalArmageddons [TA]

GC: H3Y SOLLUX  
TA: hey TZ.  
TA: what’2 up.  
GC: JUST WOND3R1NG 1F YOUV3 SPOK3N TO K4RK4T S1NC3 L4ST N1GHT  
GC: 1 C4NT S33M TO G3T HOLD OF H1M  
GC: 4ND B3FOR3 YOU 4SK NO 1TS NOT 4NYTH1NG OTH3R TH4N PL4TON1C CONC3RN FOR 4 STUP1D FR13ND  
TA: ii wa2n’t goiing to a2k.  
TA: but no ii haven’t talked to hiim.  
TA: why are you 2o worriied anyway?  
TA: ha2 he 2aiid anythiing to you before thii2?  
GC: NO 1TS JUST TH4T NORM4LLY H3 WOULD H4V3 T4LK3D TO ON3 OF US BY NOW  
GC: W3 H4D 4 STORM L4ST N1GHT 4ND 1TS UNL1K3 H1M TO M1SS 4N OPPORTUN1TY TO R4NT 4BOUT 1T  
GC: 3SP3C14LLY 4FT3R 1 M3SS4G3D H1M 4BOUT 1T TH1S 3V3N1NG  
GC: 1T W4S PR4CT1C4LLY 4N OP3N 1NV1T4T1ON! >:/  
TA: he’2 probably ju2t 2ulkiing 2omewhere liike u2ual.  
TA: ii mean why talk about your problem2 when you can ju2t lock your2elf away and waiit for them to wiither and diie liike weed2 crowdiing up your lawnriing?  
TA: all uniinviited and 2tealiing nutriient2 from the other plant2.  
TA: e%cept weed2 don’t diie they ju2t keep f*ck**ng growiing and 2preadiing untiil you have no choiice but to burn everythiing to the ground and 2tart over.  
TA: orderiing gra22 2eed2 onliine whiil2t you 2tare at the 2molderiing remaiin2 of your lawnriing.  
TA: a 2iingle tear fall2 from each eye.  
TA: two tear2 of pure 2elf-loathiing becau2e the only one you have to blame for the 2corched mon2tro2iity around your hiive ii2 your2elf.  
TA: you take all of the blame.  
TA: all of iit.  
GC: R111GHT  
GC: 4NYW4Y...  
GC: L3T M3 KNOW 1F YOU H34R FROM K4RK4T OK4Y?  
TA: okay.  
TA: and ii’ll be 2ure to tell hiim how worriied you were about hiim too.  
GC: SOLLUX, PL34S3  
GC: 1M TRY1NG TO B3 S3R1OUS 4BOUT TH1S  
TA: when have you ever been 2eriiou2 about anythiing.  
TA: you’re liike a ciircu2 clown hiigh on that 2h**t they make from 2opor.  
GC: 3XCUS3 M3 BUT 1 T4K3 OFF3NS3 TO TH4T  
GC: 1F 1 W4S GO1NG TO B3 1N THE C1RCUS 1 WOULD B3 THE R1NG L34D3R  
GC: NOT 4 DUMB CLOWN WHO 34TS SOM3TH1NG TH4T TH3Y SHOULD B3 SL33P1NG 1N  
TA: jeez, 2anctiimoniiou2 much.  
GC: J33Z HYPOCR1T3 MUCH  
TA: ii bet you don’t even know what 2anctiimoniiou2 mean2.  
GC: >:O  
GC: 1 SO DO!  
GC: 1T M34NS  
GC: *4H3M*  
GC: M4K1NG 4 SHOW OF B31NG MOR4LLY SUP3R1OR TO OTH3R P3OPL3  
TA: you got that from trollpediia didn’t you.  
GC: M4YB3  
GC: OR M4YB3 1M JUST SM4RT3R TH4N YOU THOUGHT  
GC: HHHMMM??? >:P  
TA: maybe  
GC: M4YB3 M4YB3  
GC: M4BY3  
GC: TH3 WORD M4YB3 1S ST4RT1NG TO LOOK W31RD NOW  
TA: ehehe yeah iit kind of ii2.  
TA: but anyway ii’ll let you know iif ii hear anythiing about KK.  
GC: 4ND 1 W1LL L3T YOU KNOW 1F 1 3V3R D3C1D3 TO JO1N THE C1RCUS >;]  
TA: ehehe.

theoreticalArmageddons [TA] ceased trolling gyresCalibrator [GC]

So, Karkat’s gone off the radar again. Figures. Not that he was ever on the radar to begin with, anyone would be lucky to see even half a pixel of his haemoanonymous blip. Still… It does seem a little odd that he hasn’t talked to anyone, especially when he apparently has some prime ranting material rattling around in his pan.

==> Message CG. Just to be sure.

Hey, you never know, he might just be mad at GC for something. You drop Karkat a few “hey”s and “where are you?”s (without jokes, just in case he’s not talking because he’s already pissed off), but get nothing in response. Hmm. You’ll give it some time; if you spam him he might not want to talk to you at all. He’s probably fine, you mean if anything had happened to him, his Lusus would be going haywire right? Right.

==> AG: talk to GA.

Woah, woah, woah, where did this kooky broad come from?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was surprisingly difficult? I don't write sollux POV that often so adding in the complication of a blood swap meant a lot of research and rereading. I think I'm happy with it though (but I apologise for any typos, coding mishaps and quirk exceptions)


	3. Act 1 Part 3 ==> AG: talk to GA

_== > AG: talk to GA._

It appears we’ll have to wait to hear about this young lady, she seems quite intent on having a conversation with her friend whether we are here or not. How independently dismissive of her.

aconitesGrip [AG] began trolling grimAbsolution [GA]

AG: Heeeeey Kanaya.  
AG: ?????  
AG: KANAYA.  
AG: Are you ignoring me?  
AG: An5wer me Maryam!  
GA: Hell0  
AG: Oh fin8lly!  
GA: N0 I Am N0t Ign0ring Y0u  
GA: Why W0uld Y0u Think That  
AG: Oh god are you in a fucking cave?  
GA: Im N0t Ign0ring Y0u  
GA: I Believe My Messages Are Being Delayed S0mewhat  
GA: Are Y0u Getting Any 0f These  
AG: 5iiiiigh.  
AG: I’m ju5t going to 5it here and w8 for you to catch up.  
GA: 0h Why Yes I am  
GA: Give Me A M0ment T0 M0ve T0 A M0re Suitable L0cati0n

grimAbsolution [GA] ceased trolling aconitesGrip [AG]

grimAbsolution [GA] began trolling aconitesGrip [AG]

GA: Hell0  
AG: Hey.  
AG: Are we good now?  
GA: I Think S0  
AG: Gr8. Ju5t gr8.  
AG: I don’t know why I expected anything le55 than thi5 to 8e hone5t.  
AG: You’re alway5 either too 8u5y talking to dead a55hole5, or 5o deep in 5ome ancient tom8 that it apparently take5 you 8ack to a time 8efore online communic8tion wa5 a thing.  
AG: Not even a moment left 5pare to talk to your dear 5weet moirail.  
GA: I D0nt Believe Its My Fault That Y0u Have A Habit 0f C0ntacting Me At Unfav0urable Times  
GA: Alth0ugh I Am S0rry If It Seems Like Im Ign0ring Y0u  
AG: Let’5 ju5t chalk it up to my 5hitty luck, YET AGAIN.  
GA: Have Y0u Ever C0nsidered That Y0u Might Have Less Issues If Y0u 0rganised Y0ur Things  
GA: Perhaps Created A Little M0re Fl00r Space  
AG: Don’t 5tart with that ag8in!!!!!  
AG: I’ve had enough of you telling me to pick up the 8one5 and the pelt5 and the trea5ure.  
AG: May8e I LIKE to arrange my 5poil5 for everyone to 5ee.  
AG: It ha5 nothing to do with my luck, or you for that m8tter!  
AG: 5o why don’t you ju5t can it Mi55 Meddle5ome Mcfu55yfang5.  
GA: Did Y0u Say Can It 0n Purp0se Because Y0u Kn0w I Find It Funny  
GA: 0r Did It Just Slip Y0ur Mind  
GA: Because I Cann0t Take Y0ur Argument Seri0usly N0w That Y0u Have Said It  
AG: .::P  
GA: S0 Was There A Reas0n Behind This C0nversati0n  
AG: Yes!!!!!  
AG: I need another mem8er for my Flarping team.  
AG: Normally I would let Terezi help but 5he’5 off worrying a8out Vanta5 and if you haven’t 5een him you’re 8a5ically not worth talking to.  
AG: I really don’t get tho5e two, they either need to get together or get their own live5.  
AG: 5eriou5ly, it’5 fucking painful to watch.  
GA: Why W0uld She Be W0rrying Ab0ut Karkat  
GA: Has S0mething Happened T0 Him  
AG: He ha5n’t talked to her 5ince la5t night or 5omething, I don’t know, and to 8e hone5t I really don’t c8re!  
AG: What I DO care a8out i5 having a 8ada55 rain8ow drinker on my team!  
AG: 5o, are you in????? .:;)  
GA: Are Y0u Sure Terezis Fears Are Unwarranted  
GA: Its Unlike Karkat T0 Ign0re S0me0ne even If He Is Angry With Them  
AG: Look, eeeeeveryone know5 how much of a whiny 5ulker wiggler Vanta5 i5, he’ll get over him5elf eventually and bur5t onto our 5creen5 in a tyrade of 8oring grey fury.  
AG: 8ut until then, are you going to join my team or not?  
GA: I Supp0se Y0u C0uld Be Right  
AG: Of cour5e I am.  
GA: But As F0r The R0le Play I May Have T0 Give It A Miss  
AG: Whyyyyy?????  
GA: I D0ubt That I Will Be Any S0rt 0f Asset T0 Y0ur Team  
GA: Even With My Supernatural Abilities I Lack Kn0wledge 0f The Game Itself  
GA: If It Can Even Still Be Called A Game  
GA: S0 I W0uld Pr0bably D0 M0re Harm Than G00d  
AG: >.::(  
AG: You don’t need to know the rule5!  
AG: Mo5t of them are more like guideline5 anyway.  
GA: But W0uld It N0t Be My J0b T0 Keep Y0u Fr0m Breaking The Rules  
AG: No! Just- UGH!!!!!  
AG: Okay FINE. You’ve convinced me, I won’t a5k you to 8e my teamm8 ever again.  
GA: I Didnt Say Never It Was Just Quite A Sudden Pr0p0sition  
GA: I Am Sure That I C0uld Learn En0ugh T0 Help 0ut Next Time  
AG: I guess.  
GA: Why N0t Ask Y0ur 0ther Partner  
GA: Y0u And He Are 0n Res0nable Terms N0w Right  
AG: NO.  
AG: No, No, 800000 times NO!!!!!  
AG: I am NOT a5king th8t a55hole for 8NYTHING!  
GA: 0h Was I Incorrect In My Assumpti0n That Y0u Had Put Y0ur Wigglerish Disagreement Aside  
AG: No I ju5t don’t w8nt to talk to him.  
AG: I don’t need all of hi5 nam8y pam8y drama, I have enough to deal with a5 it i5.  
GA: W0uld Talking It 0ver N0t Help  
GA: Perhaps A Little Pitch B0nding 0ver The Rivalry and C0mradery 0f The Game  
AG: He wouldn’t know comradery if it 5lapped him right in hi5 5mug pompou5 f8ce.  
AG: And 8e5ide5, I dodged a 8ullet getting him out of my quadrant5, I’m not a8out to 5tep 8ack into the line of fire.  
GA: As L0ng As Y0u Are Sure  
AG: Look, I know you ju5t love playing the village a5hen two wheeled device, 8ut I’m the la5t per5on who would need that.  
GA: Im 0nly C0ncerned F0r Y0ur Mental Wellbeing Like Any N0rmal M0irail Sh0uld be  
GA: We are Supp0sed T0 Discuss Quadrants And The Like Are We Not  
AG: Well thi5 i5 one that does5n’t need di5cu55ing ok8y?????  
GA: 0kay I Shall Respect Y0ur Wishes  
AG: UGH thank you!  
AG: At lea5t 5omeone get5 it.  
AG: Gr8 now 5pidermom need5 feeding, I’m going to go let out 5ome of my fru5tr8tion5 on innocent wild bea5t5.  
GA: G00d Luck  
GA: <>  


aconitesGrip [AG] ceased trolling grimAbsolution [GA]

aconitesGrip [AG] began trolling grimAbsolution [GA]

AG: <>

aconitesGrip [AG] ceased trolling grimAbsolution [GA]

That Maryam, always fussing and bugging and meddling in your affairs. Why can’t she just butt out and realise that you can handle it? But she is your Moirail after all, you suppose it’s her job to coddle you until you feel like you actually can’t do anything without her. Good thing you’re not one of those weak Trolls who relies on people that much though. If it was anyone else you’d have dropped them by now like you did with your ex-Kismesis, but Kanaya is a good friend, probably one of the only people you’d freely admit as such, so you’ll put up with her meddling.

Now, why don’t you tell us a bit about yourself?

Your name is Vriska Serket

You are a PIRATE HUNTER EXTRAORDINAIRE. Although not in the sense that you hunt pirates, but that you are a pirate at sea and a hunter on land. Your MASTERY OF EXTREME ROLE PLAYING extends to both of these positions. You can’t get enough of it, even though some of your friends have gotten hurt that way, including you. But you have persisted with this habit in spite of your ACCIDENT. Some people would say it’s TOO DANGEROUS. You are not one of these people.

When you aren’t role playing, you are HUNTING GREAT BEASTS in the wilderness to feed yourself and your Lusus, who is VERY HUNGRY ALL THE TIME. You take the creatures down with pure SKILL AND TACTICS. And Also your sharp CLAWS AND TEETH. You believe these abilities can overcome anything, including BAD LUCK, which you are unfortunately very familiar with. You often depict EXCITING HUNTING TALES or DRAMATIC ROLE PLAY SCENARIOS on the walls of your hive. They help you comprise new strategies to assist your fellow Flarpers and MANIPUL8 THE OTHER TEAM5. Your numerous victories provide you with treasure, experience points, and NEW TERRITORIES in which to hunt.

You are also drawn to means of DARK PROGNOSTICATION, and use the BONES OF YOUR VICTIMS as consultation devices. However, you routinely destroy them out of frustration over their PUZZLINGLY INNACURATE PREDICTIONS and have to make new ones. This has become a habit BORDERING ON FETISHISTIC, and the anger it causes to the spirits is probably the reason for your TERRIBLE LUCK. You have to stop. But addiction is a powerful thing.

Your trolltag is  aconitesGrip and your 5peech tend5 to 8e rather dramaaaaatic 8ut al5o a mite on the playful 5ide if the mood 5trike5 you right.

What will you do?

==> Vriska: equip THE MONAZITE QUINTET

You equip your set of enchanted hunting knives, the fabled Monazite Quintet. It consists of five blades that double as claws when attached to your gloves, and was plundered from a haunted castle during a particularly difficult campaign. In ancient times such weapons were employed by roving packs of Hunttackers and Hunttackresses, fierce warriors with a passion for fighting only the most impressive creatures. They’ve pretty much died off though. Not much use for hunting by hand when everyone’s got huge guns. It’s a shame really. The knives function as efficient hand-to-hand combat weapons, but when thrown they can execute a wide range of highly unpredictable attacks, depending on how they land. Certain patterns can be devastating to even the most powerful opponents.

==> Go get your Lusus

You head down to the basement, which isn’t technically underground, but it’s under your hive so you think that counts. Your hive is a grand cave-system-turned-castle that was built into the side of a mountain, and has several strategically placed exits depending on where you want to go. For hunting, you use the ground exit, which allows you to take Spidermom with you. If she wants to go that is.

She’s poised on her web when you reach the bottom of the spiral stairs to your underhive, each leg in contact with a string that leads to a web outside, her five eyes watching for any easy meals that stray too close. You gesture to the cave entrance to proposition a hunt to your Lusus, but she just stares at you blankly. Right, you guess you’re going alone then. She does give you a pat on the head before you leave though, which you begrudgingly return. You do love your deer sweet custodian, but she can be a handful. You doubt any other kid on the planet has a Lusus as high maintenance as yours.

==> Vriska: begin the hunt

Time to go slaughter the innocent creatures that roam the lands surrounding your hive. Only as many as you need though, you’re not _that_ ruthless. You wander under the cover of trees on the outskirts of the forest, treading carefully so as not to alert any potential prey to your position. Your usual quarry has been a little scarce lately, which is strange considering you’re nearing the hottest part of this sweep’s second tertile, which also happens to be the hottest hot part of the sweep as a whole. There should be swarms of animals flocking to the lake that you purposefully built your hive near for this very reason. And also because it’s like having your own natural pool. Maybe that storm last night is to blame?

Then you hear a crack and whip around knives at the ready, only to be tackled to the ground by a huge _thing_ with hooves that barely missed crushing your face and muscles and oh god it’s so sweaty and gross and– wait, wait, hold on a second. You recognise these assholes.

==> Vriska: be the Troll asshole

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay it's the spiderbitch.
> 
> Also that formatting took WAY longer than it should have, I made so many mistakes and word is a piece of trash because when I type " it doesn't look like that it looks like “ or ” and if anyone knows a way to stop that, that'd be great.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi all!
> 
> I've been thinking about bloodswap AUs a lot recently (mainly other-blood versions of Karkat) so I decided to try out my ideas in writing. I'm going to try and keep everyone mostly in character, and just apply that to their new caste, rather than switching personalities. It feels more fun that way.
> 
> I want to explore everyone's bloodswap, even if it's just once, but there will definitely be a few focal characters as the story progresses (feel free to let me know if you want to see more of someone though! Bonus chapters can definitely be a thing!).
> 
> As always, kudos and feedback are eternally appreciated, I hope you enjoyed and I wish you a good day or night my dear reader~


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